How would we know if your feelings towards another person is real? How can we say that our feelings is on the next level? These are the questions that run in my mind and my heart as of the moment.
At this point, I'm not sure if I'm just attracted, infatuated or really in love with this person. I've known this guy for quite a while and I must say, eventhough he is not chinito which is my weakness, his eyes are charming and everytime he looks at me, its like a magnet and it seems that he wants to say something. We each other because of a common friend, his bestfriend (I'd rather not name her...). He always tell me... "Ngayon lang ulit ako tumawa ng ganito dahil sa'yo..." when I crack jokes. I just reply "Clown ba ako???". He would always laugh at my jokes. Yet this person is a bit insensitive or he is just a silent type of person, I think. His answers are always on the safe side everytime I ask him questions. Sometimes, I would think of slapping him in his face to give me straight answers.
I would admit I'm happy everytime I see him. I'm happy when he laughs at my jokes. As much as possible, I don't want to expect because I don't want to get hurt if I admit my feelings to him. I don't want to have assumptions again just like the previous guy that I liked. However, there are additional questions that needs to be address. "What if I take the risk of telling him what I feel?", "What if he can reciprocate my feelings?", "What if our friendship breaks?", "What if I loose another friend?". Yeah, "WHAT" and "IF"... two simple words but too complicated to answer.